I am pretty sure everyone thought I was crazy to give up living in the Seattle area. "Where's La Grande?" is probably the most popular question I got asked the entire summer leading up to my departure. I always dismissed this question with "In the middle of no where". Regardless of what everyone else thought though, I was excited. However upon my submersion into a "small town" I quickly realized that living in hick-ville was going to be quite a change. I thought that after classes began I would meet a variety of students from all over the country, then I wouldn't feel so out of my element. But after attending all my classes and witnessing the students on campus, I realized that for my first time ever, I was an outcast.
Almost every student came from small outlying towns from the University, they had graduating classes of ten people, wore cowboy boots and hunted in their spare time. There was no way I was ever going to be able to relate to these people. I would walk around campus, getting looks up and down and I just knew they were thinking she's not from around here. Unfortunately, whatever distinctions I had that made me stand out so boldly among the rest was something I was just going to have to accept.
I enjoyed my classes, my teachers especially and I think that's what kept me holding onto the idea that Eastern Oregon University was still the place for me. But I was distracted. I like to blame the fact that I wasn't familiar with "the way college classes work" as an excuse for my unimpressive grades my first two quarters. In fact, I am always looking for a way to excuse my laziness and distractions on other elements and individuals in my life (a realization I have only started to accept). But the reality was that I was having a really difficult time adjusting to my "new life" in La Grande. Rather then focusing on my schooling (which would have been the smart thing to do) I decided to focus my energy on other things. Although I will be paying for the results of this in my following quarters at school, I do not necessarily regret this decision I subconsciously came to either.
I decided to focus on my lifestyle. I wanted to lose weight, as I had gained quite a bit after quitting soccer a few years ago. My weight gain was something that had been pointed out to be by family members frequently. However it took me being away at school to feel as though losing weight was something I was doing on my own terms, for no one else but myself. Eating healthy and exercising became my number one focus; and I was successful, losing (as of today) 32lbs. That's something to be proud about.
From this I had not only been successful in my goal, but re-established the idea that I have all the control over my life, my lifestyle. A simple concept, but one that I had lost sight of. With my new outlook I approached the last quarter of my freshman year of college with so much optimism. I submerged myself into all my classes (whether it was a subject I enjoyed or not) and my grades have certainly been reflective of this new passion. I also learned to open myself up more to those around me, regardless of how different our worlds may be; I understand now that there could be a great opportunity or relationship there just waiting to blossom. I realize more then ever that this time in my life is my one shot at pursuing my dream of becoming a Teacher, a great Teacher. It's an idea I have always had in the back of my head, but truly realize the extent of now. I'm not going to let anything hold me down or stand in my way, myself included.
